It is reasonable to assume that the mentality of Chinese girls and women is a variation of the mentality of Chinese men, but somehow softer. As the socially forming environment is the same as for men, it would not make sense to assume that the mentality of the country’s girls and women is something entirely different.

Men have an easier time judging the mentality of men than of women. When men are to judge the mentality of women, sexual emotions too easily taint the picture.

One aspect of the mentality of Chinese men is that they are much more money-oriented than the men of other countries. Furthermore, tricking (with is cheating but short of being criminal) is a sport in which some Chinese men, especially shopkeepers, excel probably more than the men of other countries.

Both, the money-mindedness and the trickery, have resulted that on the one hand, the Chinese are among the wealthiest in practically all countries to which they have migrated. On the other hand, Chinese migrants in other countries, for example in Southeast Asia, have a reputation of being dishonest in business.

So, to what extend has the money-mindedness and the tricking attitude of the Chinese society had an impact on the mentality of Chinese girls and women?

Surprisingly, when foreign men initially date ordinary Chinese girls and women, the Chinese girls and women usually stand out as being the most economical dates, more economical than dates in poorer countries such as Thailand, the Philippines, and Indonesia.

If a foreigner dates an ordinary Indonesian girl or woman, she will likely max out the opportunity on the first occasion. She’ll eat what she always wanted to eat (but could not afford), and accept happily if a foreigner offers her to buy clothes and gifts.

This is very unlikely to happen when one starts dating an ordinary Chinese girl or woman. Rather than the most expensive, she will order the cheapest item. If you go to a department store on one of the first dates, she will probably pay herself for the items she selected.

So, do you think that she is not interested in your money? Think again.

Rather than not being interested in your financial status at all, she is not interested in having minor expenses covered. She is not going for a meal, or a blouse. If she is a woman in the end of her 20s, she may be interested to become your wife (and have a big-time econo9mical benefit), and she will be aware that displaying an irresponsible attitude towards money may greatly harm her chances.

To explain the attitude of Chinese girls and women in China (there are also Chinese girls and women in other countries of Asia), let me again compare them to Indonesian girls and women, especially in Jakarta.

First of all, Indonesian women marry earlier, and have children much earlier than Chinese women. Indonesian women typically have children from the early 20s onwards, while Chinese women, especially in the cities, marry later (often mid-20s) and have children only towards the end of their 20s.

For this reason, your dating options in Jakarta, for example, are restricted to a narrower age group, about 18 to 22, while in China, they would be 19 to 29.

In Jakarta, you can chat up a girl around 20, and invite her to a Pizza Hut. She will happily accept. (It happened once to me in Jakarta that I approached a young woman, and she headed straight to a Pizza Hut, not even waiting for an invitation by me. I left, alone, without paying anything, after she ordered her Pizza.)

When you try your luck in Jakarta, you will be amazed how many girls will tell you that, oh, what an accodent, it is her birthday today. Now, if you do indeed speculate on a sexual relationship, you are under pressure to buy something for her. And she’ll try to maneuver you into buying more than you intended. Anyway, you speculate on a sexual relationship… well, not on the first day, because you do not want a prostitute.

OK, after having gone for a meal, and after having been bought some clothes, and finally, after getting some taxi money, you agree to meet again the next day. But don’t be surprised if she sends you a message in the evening that, so sorry, she is planning to get married next week.

It’s a standard excuse, and I have heard it more than once. As I knew the trick anyway, I always kept gifts and restaurant bills at a minimum in Jakarta. But just like the “today is my birthday” story, the “I’ll get married next week” line is a standard operating procedure of rather ordinary Indonesian girls in Jakarta. They’ll tell their boyfriend or husband about it. He won’t mind. Anyway, the things that were bought by the stupid foreigner, he won’t have to buy.

Now, all of the above is very, very unlikely to ever happen to you in China (unless you were chatted up by a girl in Beijing). Ordinary Chinese girls and young women do not play such cheap tricks.

But does this mean that Chinese women and girls are not money-minded? It does not. Once you have initiated a love relationship, and well before you can bed her properly, the development of your relationship will, yes: will, depend on how many resources you commit. But the matter is unlikely to be discussed openly.

OK, you hold hands, you kiss (not on the first date, but after having met a few times). She will likely show a responsible attitude towards your finances. But when you have established a love relationship (without full intercourse so far), it will be very helpful if you buy some rather more expensive items for her… a notebook computer, for example, or some furniture for her home.

If you are a failure in making such larger expenses, your relationship is very likely, indeed, to stall. But it will probably never be uttered that it is because you are unwilling to spend money on her.

So, how does this compare, overall, with Jakarta. Not bad, I would say. The Jakarta attitude is just stupid, and the values that can be obtained from the foreigner are very limited. And even though the Jakarta girls tricked you, you cannot say that they are money-wise. If they were, they would realize that having a foreigner as boyfriend will be economically much more beneficial than having a local boyfriend. So, while the Jakarta girls are tricking you, they are not money-smart.

The Chinese attitude is much smarter, and it is even fairer. Sure, the foreigner is expected to spend liberally on his girlfriend. But he usually also gets a sexually satisfying relationship in exchange.

As for the trickery… We haven’t encountered much cheap trickery in China ourselves (not the Jakarta kind). But it may exist among girls that are borderline prostitutes.